Separation Anxiety - for 18-year-old?
Is it normal for an 18-year-old to go through separation anxiety?
Anxiety Question:
I have been so upset and crying lately. I go to college about two hours from home and it's hard for me to make friends since I'’m so shy and my new school doesn't have a student center. I cry when I visit my family and I cry when I leave my family. Yesterday I found myself crying all day after my mom dropped me back off at school.
Is it normal for an 18-year-old to go through separation anxiety?
Anxiety Answer:
What you're feeling is normal and it will get better. My daughter experienced separation anxiety. She chose a college that was four hours away. I took her on a Sunday. By Thursday she was calling me to ask me to come pick her up, in full panic attack mode, sobbing and crying and begging me that she would do anything if I would just come get her. She hadn't been able to keep anything down but fruit punch since I'd dropped her off on Sunday. All she did was sleep and vomit, sleep and vomit. On the phone with me, she was crying and hysterical in a way I'd never heard before.
I did go and pick her up. She was beyond the pale when it came to separation anxiety and homesickness. She went four days without eating and it wasn't getting any better. Also, she wasn't having trouble sleeping (normal level of homesick) - she was sleeping non-stop (trying to shut out where she was altogether.) This is a different level.
I think what you're experiencing is a bit more normal and it should get better with time. Try to locate guidance or the health center at your school; or speak to your RA about what services might be available or any suggestions they might have.
Do you have friends that you IM with? For some students, this is a great way to stop feelings of separation anxiety; they IM with their friends from high school or with their family members. Above all, don't let it bother you that you're feeling this way. You love your family and your home! That's never bad and it's okay to miss them. Moving away and living somewhere else and feeling like you're "on your own" can be frightening.
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